Part 3 – After the Affair. Take Responsibility & Do the Work: A Journey of Healing & Redemption After Betrayal

Special Seven Year Podcast Anniversary Series

-with guest Shawn Cheadle, Lora’s husband, and betraying partner

 

Tune in to the third and final interview Shawn Cheadle, Lora’s husband and the man who betrayed her. In this final episode, Shawn shares his personal journey of taking full accountability for his actions after initially blaming Lora for his behavior. Shawn candidly discusses his struggles with effective communication and acknowledges the need for personal growth to improve his marriage. Throughout the conversation, Shawn highlights the underlying vulnerabilities that contributed to his affairs and the importance of exploring and addressing them in order to heal. He emphasizes the importance of getting back to one’s core and doing the necessary work, even if the relationship doesn’t work out, because it leads to personal growth, self-empowerment, and authentic living.

In addition, Shawn and Lora delve into the deepening of their relationship as they come to a greater understanding of themselves individually. They discuss how their growth as individuals and as a couple is leading to a stronger foundation in their marriage. They explore how to navigate the opinions and judgments of others, as well as dealing with shame and fear. Lora Cheadle, an attorney and betrayal recovery coach, guides the conversation and shares her own insights on forgiveness and the importance of focusing on oneself in the journey of recovery.

This episode is part of a 3-part interview series with Lora’s husband, Shawn, who betrayed her. They have previously discussed Shawn’s mindset before and during the affairs, and now focus on his healing journey, redemption, and facing what he did. Join us on this powerful episode of FLAUNT!! as we dive deeper into the complexities of healing and redemption after infidelity or betrayal. Hear firsthand how a couple navigates the challenges of rebuilding trust and finding personal growth in the aftermath of betrayal.

 

Top Take-a-ways

1. Take accountability: Shawn initially placed blame on Lora for his actions, but he eventually realized that he had to take full ownership of what he had done. It’s vital to acknowledge our mistakes and take responsibility for our actions after betrayal or infidelity.

 

2. Resolve conflicts & work through pain: Shawn emphasized the importance of addressing conflicts and working through the pain in relationships. It’s not always easy, but doing the necessary work leads to personal growth and a stronger foundation in the relationship.

 

3. Come home to oneself: Shawn discovered the importance of returning to his core and doing the inner work to address shame, guilt, and lack of ability to communicate. By exploring vulnerabilities and addressing them head-on, he was able to grow as an individual and become a better partner.

 

This interview series with Lora and her husband Shawn – the man who betrayed her – is a raw, vulnerable, and very real conversation about Shawn’s state of mind and understanding of what happened before, during and after his multiple affairs.

These conversations are intended to serve two purposes:

First, to provide an understanding of what goes on in the heart and the mind of someone who cheats, and to shed light on some of confusing and irrational behaviors surrounding affairs, and

Second, to provide you, the betrayed partner, with something to share with the person who cheated on you, to facilitate conversation and bridge some of the gaps in your collective understanding. Especially if you are trying to reconcile or need to amicably coparent with them.

While the circumstance of everyone’s situation is different, surprisingly, there are many similarities. Affairs tend to be born out of pain and an inability to express one’s feelings. Quite often, even though an affair causes more pain, more shame, and more guilt, the cheating partner irrationally believes that cheating is a viable option to lower their pain, and then find themselves stuck in a situation they don’t know how to get out of.

It is our joint intention to step bravely into the truth of our situation. To shine a light on a subject that, while shockingly common, is still judged and stigmatized and to do our part in moving the conversation out of the shadows and into the light. May these shows provide you with more answers and understanding than you had before.

It is important to note that while nothing excuses the choices made by the cheating partner, and the blame for the affairs lies squarely on the one who cheats, it is our hope that these conversations inspire a deeper level of awareness and compassion for the plight of the betraying partner. Not to let them off the hook or to mitigate the damage and pain caused by their actions, but to help you in your journey to forgiveness, by way of understanding and acceptance.

After all, Life is hard, hurt people hurt people, and it is only when we reach out and try to understand another’s perspective are we able to rise above the collective traumas of the past and create a better, healthier world for all.

Part1 is very raw, emotional, and intense. The angst in Shawn’s voice is reflective of his emotions at the time he first chose to have an affair.

Parts 2 and 3 are clear and powerful as they reflect Shawn’s growth in understanding about his journey. He takes a deep dive into what kind of person he is, forgiveness, and how he returned to his inner core to integrate himself fully into the man he was meant to be all along.

 

Download your Sparkle After Betrayal Recovery Guide at www.BetrayalRecoveryGuide.com, a guide designed to help you take the first steps in feeling better, so you can reclaim your power, own your worth, and start putting yourself, and your life, back together again.

 

About Lora:

Attorney, speaker and Burnout & Betrayal Recovery Coach, Lora Cheadle believes that betrayal uncovers the truth of what’s possible when we stop focusing on what was done to us and start showing up unapologetically for ourselves. She helps women rebuild their identity and self-worth after infidelity so they can reclaim (or find for the very first time) their confidence, clarity, and connection to source and create their own kind of happily ever after.

 

Thank you to BetterHelp for sponsoring this podcast! Take charge of your mental health and get 10% off your first month of therapy at https://BetterHelp.com/FLAUNT